Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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