When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
