Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
