yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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