After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
