i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
