Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
