that's an acceptable place to lick
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
