Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
