Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
