Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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