And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
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Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
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I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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