you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
