2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
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you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
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he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"