Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
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