Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize