can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize