Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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