oh god the rape fog is back!
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize