i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just want to make out with him forever
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He shit in the fireplace
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
