also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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