I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize