Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
