I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
