Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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