I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
