Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?