Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
