smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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