It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
you never un-have a 4some
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize