and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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