Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
