dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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