Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
