Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
