he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
