i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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