i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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