There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I just blew my weed a kiss
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
