1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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