he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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