Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
It's official drugs can't kill me
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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