Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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