He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
