Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
