just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
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