I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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