Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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