I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Never joke about your clitoris.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
