Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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